All About Gay Cruises

Conjure up all the images you can of what you think an all-gay cruise is like, and just sorta put that on hold for a minute. Yes, all the gay butt-slapping, towel-whipping, wristband-wearing, speedo and banana hammock-donning buff guys with no chest hair and perfectly chiseled faces… put all that aside.  
The first thing you will probably feel on an all-gay cruise is comfort. Not just creature comforts, but the comfort of knowing that there are so many other people like you out there. You’ll get to feel a little like straight people feel on a straight cruise! If you’ve ever been to a gay event, it might remind you of that. At the very least, it’ll be a comfortable, totally hassle-free vacation, and you’ll forget all about any discrimination you may have encountered in the past. It’ll be a perfect, almost dreamlike escape from your everyday life.

A gay cruise can be a great way to take a trip as a couple, or if you’re single, to meet people. Some boats cater more to couples, and some more to partygoing singles, but there is always something for everyone. Do your research beforehand and you probably won’t be disappointed.

Gay cruises book the same cruise ships as mainstream lines, so you’ll get the same luxurious rooms, great food, big drinking and gambling, onboard activities… and then a lot more that are gay-oriented. Of course, no one can guarantee a romantic encounter, but given that you’ll be isolated on a luxurious boat around great scenery with other like-minded individuals, there’s more than a chance! Gay cruises are jam-packed with fun events for everyone, and you’ll probably make a few friends while on board.

Every line differs, but overall, there are more parties on gay cruises and they tend to go on a bit later. They also have theme parties and theme nights, and other funky entertainment (gay comedians, drag shows etc.). If you don’t like that, that’s ok. With hundred to thousands of people onboard, you’re likely to find others with the same tastes as you. We’re going to try and talk about some of the things that make each cruise unique in reviews and when discussing upcoming cruises. We’re also going to look at how each travel destination is for the gay traveler.  

A lot of people, maybe half to three-quarters, decorate their doors on gay cruises. It’s not necessary of course, but it’s all in the spirit of celebrating. People will decorate with everything from traditional decorations, to wild jungle motifs and even some kinky stuff, though you wouldn’t really want to take this too far. If you want to take part in this, you’ll need to bring your own supplies on board, and make sure nothing’s too permanent.  

If you’re the sort of person who doesn’t like the out-there, extroverted, I’m-gay-and-you-know-it type activities, that doesn’t mean a gay cruise isn’t for you. Just like with straight cruises, there are party boats, there are uber-luxury high-class boats, and there are boats in the middle. As with everything else, know what you’re getting into, make an informed decision, then have no regrets!  

 

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Stupid as it might sound, this is a valid question. There are other vacations to take – you could hit New York City and live it up for a few days, fly to Hawaii for a week, get married in Toronto, check out gay bars in Singapore or get it on with a gay friend from across the pond. So why a cruise then?

Number 10 - For The Gay Atmosphere

A gay cruise is full of fun (gay) activities, and there’s always something to do. However, there’s an intrinsic value associated with gay cruises, and it can be attributed to an unspoken understanding and care shared by all the people on the boat. We all understand where we’re coming from, the issues we’ve had to face and the day-to-day struggles we see. With that kind of bond already formed, you know good times are ahead!

Number 9 - To Feel The Acceptance of Straight People

Straight people never have to wonder if people are accepting of their relationship. They can just march right onto any cruise ship, make out, feel each other up, and all people will do is say “get a room!” Have you ever felt what it’d be like to not think what others are thinking? If they’re judging? A gay cruise is full of people like you, and a no-discrimination philosophy abounds. You can relax, lay back, and pretend the whole world’s gay, because, as far as you can see, it is!

Number 8 - To Show Off Your Summer Collection and Get a Tan

We’re gay, and we love to look our best! This is a great way to show off the body you’ve been working hard to get, along with great summer clothes, flip-flops, or however far you wanna take it (just a banana hammock). Plus, you get to work on your tan (or blacken your blackness) and look all exotic when you come back to the real world.

Number 7 - To Eat Nice Food and Not Cook

Why cook when you don’t have to? Sure, you could apply this philosophy at home, but then you’d be limited to MSG-laden takeout or cardboard microwavable “dinners.” No, a better idea is to just get on a boat, and have a team of chefs prepare gourmet food for you, and deliver that food to you anywhere on the boat. Yes, that is a better idea.

Number 6 - To Get Drunk and Do Stupid Things

Worried about that deadline? Recession eating into your profits? Clients not liking your designs? Just say, “I dunno. I was drunk, and I don’t remember a thing!” You can’t say that in your normal life, but you can on a boat!

Number 5 - For All The Fun and Funky Activities

Gay cruises are the most fun cruises in the world, seriously! They get awesome cruise boats that have all the cool stuff (shops, casinos, live theater, live entertainment, swimming pools, hot tubs, water slides etc.), but they have a ton of superb gay activities too!

Number 4 - To See an Exotic Part of the World

Tired of the flat North American landscape? Want to pretend you’re in Lost? Or maybe, you just wonder how the rest of the world lives? Cruising to a hot, spicy exotic destination is just the ticket. You’ll get to see a unique local culture, sample deliciously different cuisine, and surround yourself in an environment that is very different from your own. This is really great fun!

Number 3 - To Meet Gays, er… Guys

Yes, the fact is, a gay cruise is a great place to meet guys if you’re single. It’s also a great place to meet other gay couples. You’ll make temporary boyfriends, friends, and maybe even something better!  

Number 2 - To Get It On

We’ve established that a gay cruise is a great place to meet guys. Duh. Thousands of gay guys, you. Rocket science, I know. But think about this… if you want to get it on, where better? Other people want to get it on. You want to get it on. You’re isolated on a boat, with nowhere to go.  

Number 1 - To Get On a Boat With Other Guys, Get Away, and See What Happens 

Really, the best reason to go on a gay cruise, is to just get away, and let nature or destiny (whatever you want to believe in) take its course. Once in a while, we all need to just let go completely, let our guard down (us gays more than anyone), and see where life takes us.  

 

If you’re not ready for an all-gay cruise, or there’s something you don’t like about them, the next best thing is gay group cruises. Gay group cruises are basically an organized group of gays on what would be an otherwise straight cruise. They’re treated like any other group, such as a company or other arranged group. It’s like a cruise within a cruise!
The gay group on a large ship might be between 1 and 10% of all the passengers. The experience is somewhere in between being on a mainstream cruise and an all-gay cruise, as you might expect. Meetings and activities will be arranged, which will make it easy to find friends and dining buddies, but gay activities will sometimes be in closed quarters, so as not to offend other passengers. There are some special events though, parties, bar events or access to certain areas or lounges that might otherwise not be available. With a smaller group, it’ll be easier to get to know the other members of the group, but you won’t have the diversity and choice you would with an all-gay cruise.

Expect a meet and greet (called a Friends of Dorothy meeting on mainstream cruises), other get-to-one-another activities, parties, theme dinners, bar gatherings and such. You can’t be as openly gay as you would be able to on an all-gay ship, so sunbathing with your partner or public displays of affection might not be all that well-received.

The good thing about gay group cruises is that there are far more options than with gay cruises. They have different ports of call, destinations, timings and are far more numerous in availability. As a result, pricing may also be more competitive than it would be with an all-gay cruise. However, you need to look into whether those destinations and ports of call are of your interest, and if you’re into public affection, if those cities are accepting of that. Kingston, Jamaica, for example, doesn’t receive that sort of thing too well, but Vancouver, British Columbia is one of the most gay-friendly cities in the world.

If you’re a quiet, introverted person, a gay group cruise might suit you more than an all-gay cruise. No crazy butt-slapping or an overdose of banana hammocks, but still presenting the opportunity to meet other gays, it might actually be a more legitimate way to meet people. It’ll allow you to mix with straight couples and others, but how that goes will probably be no different from being back home - some people are open to it, and some aren’t.

Gay group cruises are like a half-step into all-gay cruises. You get to sample a lot of the benefits, but aren’t forced into that atmosphere. On the other hand, all-gay cruises go to destinations that they’ve found to be gay-friendly, and there’s no chance of weird looks from other passengers. The choice is tough, but it can’t hurt to do both - starting with a gay group cruise. As always, the best option is to thoroughly investigate your options, give it a lot of thought, then make your decision and be happy with it!

Seasickness is a given. Today’s modern cruise ships are so big that seasickness is almost a thing of the past. There is advanced technology that counters the motions of the sea, and even if you do somehow get it, there are lots of remedies onboard.
I’ll get some kind of crazy virus. With potentially thousands of people and a confined space, you might think that viruses will be a problem. It’s not actually any different from going to the mall or another similarly crowded place, so you don’t have anything to worry about. Of course, wash your hands before eating and all that.

Everything is free/inclusive on a big cruise. Not everything is free on most cruise ships. Passengers paying for the basic low fares will have to pay extra for drinks, be it wine or bottled water. As the cruise ships improve in the entertainment department, you might find yourself paying for things that aren’t part of the basic package. The cruise lines basic fare usually includes the room, board and regular amenities like the swimming pool and entertainment. So, you’ll pretty much have to pay for extra drinks and tips.

I have to sit and eat with strangers and at preordained times. Even though this might still be the case for some cruise ships, more and more cruise lines are adopting a different approach for dinner. These cruise lines give the passengers the choice of sitting at different tables at whatever time they want. You’ll also find that today’s modern cruise ships offer a variety of restaurants to choose from which would make it easier to dine with people you enjoy having food with. Many of the gay cruises in 2009 use modern ships from Norwegian cruise line, Royal Caribbean and the other big ones, so they also follow the open menus… you can even have food delivered to your room, at almost any time, sometimes at no extra charge.

It’ll be crowded like crazy on there. Cruise ships that can accommodate more than 3000 passengers might seem too crowded for you, but in actuality it’s just like most hotels and restaurants you would go to. The cruise ship managers have lot of experience at keeping the crowd under control. You’ll easily find a nice quiet spot if you’d like. Luxurious cruise ships often have lots of room for everyone and roomy common places throughout the ship.

It’s a senior mecca on the ship. While seniors do love taking cruises, there are so many choices nowadays when it comes to cruises, and so much specialization, that everyone can find a cruise that they feel suited to. Gay cruises are usually full of younger guys too.

Cruise ships can go down like the Titanic. Cruise ships are actually very safe, and keep improving with every new generation. There’s practically no risk in cruising at all.

There’s nothing to do on the dang ship. Cruise ships are full of fun activities for everyone. From gourmet restaurants to gyms, lounges, libraries, movie theaters, live shows and more, you’ll find something fun to do. And then there’s everything you can check out at the ports of call and destinations!

Some people love to pack, and some people hate it. Personally, I fall into the former category. I love the idea of preparing for an adventure away from the everyday mundane routine. However, I’ve gone through situations where I’ve underpacked and overpacked. How do you avoid either? Well, you read a list like this!
If you want to learn what NOT to take, take these packing tips.



Must-Haves:

Plane tickets, or e-tickets

Cruise tickets and documents

Passport (visa if necessary)

Driver’s license

Auto insurance slip or card

Medical insurance card or Health card if you’re Canadian

Copies of your prescriptions

List of medicines you might be bringing

Credit cards

Debit and/or ATM cards

Prepaid phone cards

Unlocked SIM cell phone and charger with adapter if necessary

Local SIM card

Cash

Traveler’s checks

List of emergency contacts

Optional, But Fun or Useful:

Sunglasses

Guidebooks such as Lonely Planet or Frommer’s

Netbook (these are really cheap and small)

Digital camera (preferably an SLR with close- and long-range lenses)

Batteries or charger for digital camera

Extra memory cards for your digital camera

Sony PSP or Nintendo DS and respective charger(s)

iPhone (the GPS, compass, alarm clock, contact list, internet browsing, email etc. come in handy) or other capable smartphone

For the Obssessive-Compulsive, or Those With Macgyver Complexes:

Duct tape (only you, imagining yourself as Macgyver can think of uses for this)

corkscrew (because why would a fully-equipped cruise ship have this on board?)

umbrella (because it rains indoors on a cruise ship)

Swiss Army Knife (this is survival gear,baby)

Crazy glue (you never know when you’ll have to seal someone’s lips)

A deck of cards (if the TV, internet, all the fun activities and people all die, you could play cards)

Clothes pins (because you want to do you laundry yourself, AND like its 1885 baby!)

Do you have packing issues – sorry – I should rephrase that for modernity’s sake, would you say that you are packing-challenged? I know I used to be. You’d know it too if you saw what I took with me on a “backpacking” trip. Two suitcases and a giant hockey bag! Overpacking out of excitement is something many of us often (or so I tell myself), but don’t fret. I have some tips here that might help you on your vacation or cruise.
Febreze. If you’re even somewhat sensitive to smells or dislike stale air, bring a bottle of this stuff. It’ll freshen up the more stale areas of your bathroom, or combat the smells of food, perfume, or whatever crazy stuff can go on in the halls.

Ginger. You can use it to cleanse your palate when having sushi, or use candied ginger to help remedy motion sickness. Today’s big boats have less, but if you get motion sickness, you’ll need to get over it – and ginger works!

Don’t stuff things in. Your suitcases will fit a lot more if you fold clothes as flat s they can be, kind of like when they’re new. If you don’t, not only will you be able to fit less, the wrinkles will really set in, giving you more work to do after you unpack.

If you’re a couple, mix your clothes up a little. Each suitcase should contain items of clothing belonging to both of you. Why? In case one suitcase gets lost or misplaced, you’ll have things to wear!

Check the dress codes. If you’re planning on having dinner with the crew and there’s a formal dress code, plan accordingly. If you don’t plan on doing that sort of thing, and simply want to lounge on the deck – bring appropriate clothing.

Don’t pack everything. Figure out what your itinerary is like, and plan your clothing and other needs based on that. You could lay out your outfits on the bed, maybe on the shower rod, and look at them sequentially. 

Check if your cruise has onboard laundry. Most large ships do, and most of the gay cruises in 2009 are also using those ships, so in this case, pack a little lighter, and buy some souvenir shirts along the way!

Go easy on the “just in case” scenarios. I remember when I told myself, “what if I’m backpacking Thailand and I don’t find any clean water? This giant water purifying kit from the makers of the ultimate juice squeezer will save my life!” 

Make sure your bags remain closed. You could pay for that plastic wrap service at the airport, but cheaper solutions might be to use wire tires and duct tape. Admittedly, duct tape is not the most elegant solution, but at least it won’t be your underwear on the conveyor belt. 

Double tag your bags. You really don’t want to take any risks when it comes to your luggage. Put on an extra set of tags with your information, just in case.

Suitcase identity crisis! Everyone has the same brands and styles of luggage these days, so what can you do to set yours apart? Why not decorate it? Use oil-based paints, spray paints, anything that doesn’t come off. Some people have started to put their internet names like Funkmast3r, but do what you want, go crazy! Especially on themed cruises and gay cruises, this will really help you stand out.